The winds, they are a'changin'

Well hello, ephemeral, invisible, and possibly non-existent audience. A good day to you.
This has been quite a week. So, because I like lists, I shall sum it up for you:

1. Had a blast at the Writer's Retreat 2011. Despite fighting a nasty cold, I managed to whip out a sentence for our "worst first sentence of a novel" contest, also known as a Bulwer-Lytton contest. George Bulwer-Lytton is famous for the cliche "It was a dark and stormy night..." More specifically, he began his novel Paul Clifford like so:


It was a dark and stormy night--the rain fell in torrents--except at occasional intervals, when it was      checked by a violent gust of wind which swept up the streets (for it is in London that our scene lies), rattling along the housetops, and fiercely agitating that scanty flame of the lamps that struggled against the darkness.


And here is my contribution to the contest:


The relationship ended, she realized, the day he had shaved his beard--oh that magnificent beard, which preceded him with proud protuberance, putting the bushy tails of sleek squirrels to such a shame that they brought offerings of winter-aged nuts while weeping over their inadequacy--and every time she looked upon the balded chin bereft of the masculine, yet tender, homage to Sampson's strength, she was overcome with a poignant pain that overshadowed her once all-consuming love.


Which one is worse? You'll be the judge, but remember: mine has squirrels AND beards AND a Biblical allusion. 


2. Got a 99 (yes, out of 100, Dad) on my Japanese midterm. I wasn't particularly worried about it, but it is nice to prove to my new professor that I am a capable, intelligent young woman that my chronic lateness might not suggest. Or my doodling. Or my habit of checking the clock every five minutes. She doesn't know that she's teaching a schoolwork ninja!


3. We got our housing issue worked out, so I will be living with some lovely girls next year who like hugs, respect English majors, and like watching movies. And there's the potential of maintaining proximity to the Conundrum that is my crush. But a lady doesn't not-kiss and tell.


4. I am (drumroll please...) GOING TO ITALY THIS SUMMER!!!! I apologize for the capitalization and exclamation marks, but really, I got a scholarship (which means hopefully zero or little money out of my pocket) to study Italian for a month in Perugia, Italy. Alicia's No Carb Left Behind tour (forget Eat, Pray, Love-- it's going to be Eat, Eat, Eat!)


So, another list of Extra-Concentrated Joy. The sun is out, the temperatures are up, and I am smiling!
--Momo