Living Up to the Name

When I began this blog a year and a half ago, it was an experiment. I thought long and hard about what the "theme" of the blog was going to be. I knew from the experience of friends that I didn't want to pigeonhole myself into one facet of my life or another, only to lose inspiration or interest. I rarely have moments of foresight; sometimes I wish they occurred more often with happenstances of greater importance. In this case, as exampled by the sporadic nature of my posts as it is, the choice for my blog to remain more general was an intelligent one.

With the specifics removed from the table (food, school, writing, travel, etc.), I wondered how I was going to focus this blog, or if I even could. Then it hit me: all of my life, I've been striving to be better. Whether it's faith, relationships, writing, food, or fitness, I've wanted to be a different me. I've always wanted a reflection that doesn't disappoint reality.

So I named myself Person in Progress, and I eventually chose a photo I took of a cathedral in Cork, Ireland. I've probably written it before, but the fighting of monsters seemed the appropriate metaphor. And as the months have passed, the theme of the blog has remained appropriate, but not so much as in the last two.

I graduated from college. After four years of work and adventures, I finally achieved that milestone. I didn't have to walk across a stage, for which I, and all the other high-heels wearing gals, was profoundly grateful. But I shook hands, received my placeholder "diploma," and went back out into the sunshine for photos with friends and professors and a celebration dinner with the family who came to see it. I wish I had some of those photos. When I go to Georgia for my brother's graduation in August, I will pester my father for them.

I am living in a house with friends. A duplex, really, but created from a house so large we only feel the division when our neighbors are particularly boisterous. So I pay bills now. I have to keep up with the cobwebs.

And I have a job! On graduation day, at the Senior Breakfast, someone said something along the lines of "92% of Calvin graduates either have a job or are attending graduate school within six months of graduation." Me, being an English major frustrated with the job search process, snarked "Well, I'm the 8%." God has a funny way of making my sarcasm come back to bite me. In this case, that was a good thing. So now I have a full time position with Baker Publishing Group. I have (or will have soon) benefits. I get a paycheck. I have coworkers, all of whom have been wonderful so far. And now, as the craziness begins to settle down, I'm even considering a gym membership.

So I've progressed from one stage of my life to the next. For the first time since I was four years old, I'm not a student. My days are no longer measured in quarters, semesters, and summer vacations. I have no reason to depend on my parents, though they don't mind helping me in the least.

It's not been an easy transition. I'll be honest. I miss college--not the deadlines, of course, but the community. I lived with my friends. I went to class with my friends. As someone who has traveled long distances, and left friends on the other side, I know that they can cause divisions to the closest of friendships. I don't get to see people as much anymore, plain and simple. Some friends, like me, have stayed in Grand Rapids. Others have moved on. Either way, our new lives separate us. It's been a heart-wrenching experience: I am so proud of all of us for getting this far, for following dreams and facing harsh realities. But I'm also sad, in my selfish way, to see them go on to better things.

So I'm progressing.